well I have exactly "blogged" in a really long time...been kept isolated and busy from my website but life's been okay I guess. I turned sixteen a little while ago and honestly it doesn't feel much different. It felt like any other day and nothing special although I had some really good celebrations with my friends for my birthday. There's not to talk about other than the constant work that I have to do sometimes and well lets just say that I try to keep myself busy...why? To get away from certain things I suppose, things that I don't really like to face. At least I have gotten more sleep now. I also received my report card the other day. My grades are okay I guess but I'm really worried about next year, it's just going to be so different and more things to do and even more things to worry about sometimes. There's just not enough time in the day for everything. I do feel like that sometimes. Hmm....I don't want to grow up...there are all these responsibilities and things that you have to do sometimes. Even though I find myself a mature person I don't feel like I can take on everything just yet. I still want to have some fun in my life but with all these troubled things that come up it just doesn't seem too possible at the moment.
I have forgotten how good it makes me feel to write. I haven't written anything much ever since spring semester begun. I mean I wrote some stuff but they weren't that great. I also haven't stayed up this late since I was in sixth grade. Ahh I remember those times when I didn't really have to worry about finishing homework just yet because I had already finished it or whether or not I had an assignment that I had to do because I had already done it or if my parents would nag at me because I was still a young girl and I didn't have to worry about those things just yet... Now it has all changed. It has all changed just because I have grown older and somewhat smarter but not really. Everything just gets confusing now the more that I think about them. I'm not exactly sure what I want to do in life anymore and the more I think about it I'm not sure if that is what God wants me to do or if it's just what I want to do. Sometimes to reject my parents ideas of what is a good career in life in America...I thought that era was over. The period where people came over in hopes of getting a better educations and a better future for their next generation but the more that I look into it, the more I discover that I am that generation.
The generation that should be coming out with the next new medicine and discovering new stars in the sky. I am the generation for my parents. The generation to give them pride in their children and reassure themselves that they made a right choice in coming to America because they understood the potential and the freedom that lies here. But all life is is what you make of it. It's what you have to do in school and the choices that you decide to take. But just thinking about this now brings me back to church and how we had a lesson on making decision with God. We should pray about it and talk to other fellow Christians about it and just know that whatever God had in store for us it's ultimately what God planned for us and we should put our trust in Him...So thus all this typing has been just a way for me to vent myself because I like to write more than I like to talk..and maybe this is just an easier way for me . I also think I write better than I speak maybe it's because I get the chance to correct myself whereas when you speak once you say it that's it...
Anyways here are some pictures from the birth celebration that people planned for me at my house...What a surprise party, it was suppose to be a meeting but it turned out to be something more than that and honestly they all made me week feel so much better and knowing that I have so many friends and I am just so blessed to have everything that I do. Okay that's enough typing for now. Good Night people and enjoy your weekend.
