Blown Up???(couldn't think of a good title any suggestions?)

I've finally blown up....
It's been revealed
and all the tears won't seem to matter
when all that's left is fear
all the times I've wandered
searching for the happiness
and now that I see it's in me
I just have to try and find it
though it's hard for me to stand here
and look into your eyes
I feel the shame inside as I watch myself die
thought you'd be glad to have me back
but no difference did it make
no look upon my face
all my smiles are erased
not once did we say good morning or good bye
not once did I take off my mask
but I saw you
happy and unchanged,
laughing and new
I'm happy for you
that's all I can say
as for me good-bye forever I'm going away




By the way I sent in my application for the scholarship and I will have to wait till friday to see the results. I hope I can get it so then I will be able to spend three days in a conference with other writers. It'll be really nice if I could.
Finals are eh....doing okay I guess....