I didn't like today especially 7th period because it was somber. I was first to present my project in class and I choose to do so but when I got up there it just felt like everything fell apart. I don't know how but even I feel apart. I started crying and yes it wasn't a pretty site but I was unhappy about my project but in the end everything turned out alright. I'm not completely mad about it but I understand that I shouldn't doubt myself. I have the ability to do anything that I want but it's not just my want to do it, it also has to deal with who and what's involved inorder to make it happen. Hmm.....I have a lot of homework today but I'm almost finished just half way through my Social Studies homework. Did I tell you about choosing classes for Lowell, I don't think I did but anyways sometime last week there was a lady that came to my school and she talked about some of the things we'll experience at Lowell and some of the things there. We had to fill out cards and pick our classes-I thought it was a bit early but they didn't- I found out pretty surprising things about the school and it sound fun so I don't know maybe it'll be good for me. Umm lets see there were three classes I was required to take one of them was English or something and Modern History I think. Then there was the Math class which I have to go in and take a Placement Test in May and then I choose P.E. and then I had two more classes I could pick. There were a lot of chooses and I do wish that one of them would've been journalism because I really wanted to take that class but no my parents were not going to let me so yeah maybe next semester hopefully. Anyways I choose a language and no not Chinese sorry. I choose Latin and French. Then I choose Science-Biology. Then it would be my Arts which was orchestra and something else that I forgot and that was it. I don't know how much I'll miss middle school but it already seems like I'm parting from it. I'm always more focused on my work rather than school actually. I mean I love school honestly but there's always something about it that makes it exciting to me and always boring to many others. In Lowell I just hope to find people with the same interests like me. That's it I'm so tired I really should get some good sleep before I start falling asleep which I had done a few times already. Bye Bye
By the way I wrote a new poem yesterday as I was talking to a friend I forgot to post it but I wanted to show off the one my friend wrote to me hehe. So anyways yeah here it is.

Memory
Written by Wendy Lee

The mountains never so white
The rose never so bright
The air over the candlelight
Is in the heart of the ocean
The moon shining over the bay
The wind slowly becomes decayed
The stars start to appear
As I begin to let the fear
Wander all over the grass of the ground
Then you fly over the pink and blue
Thinking that I’ll always be with you
But the truth is that this life
Was not meant for me
But for another that will solely be yours
WE can stand on four feet
And not ever see
We’ll be as blind as ever
There wouldn’t even be the slightest bit of cleverness
I can say that the branches and the trees
Will keep on growing
But the mountains will always be white
The rose will always be bright
The air over the candlelight
The moon shining over the bay
The wind slowly begin to decay
And the stars will start to appear

Understand : Royal Bui

knowing this feeling....that you understand me...
is like nothing i've ever felt before......
and i couldn't imagine this feeling....
without you...without the way that you make me feel....
but i know that i can show you who i truly am....
and knowing that you make me feel this way...
is understanding the true meaning of life....
i've lived everyday trying to find the person....
that makes me feel this way....
and knowing that i finally found that person...
that understands me for who i truly am....is incredible...
and finally i know that person.....
is you...


Ahh I feel so good someone wrote something about me hehe...my good friend Royal from school. yep
okay that's it bye bye

"Somewhere a voice calls in the depths of my heart
May I always be dreaming the dreams that move my heart
So many tears, of sadness, uncountable through and through
I know on the other side of them, I'll find you
Everytime we fall down to the ground, we look up to the blue sky above
We wake to its blueness as for the first time
Though the road is long and lonely and the end is far away, out of sight
I can with these two arms, embrace the light
As I big farewell, my heart stops, in tenderness I feel
My silent empty body begins to listen to what is real
The wonder of living the wonder of dying
The wind, town, and flowers we all dance one unity
somewhere, a voice calls, in the depth of my heart
Keep dreaming your dreams, don't ever let them part
Why speak of sadness and life's painful woes
Instead let the same lips sing a gentle song for you
The whispering voice, we never want to forget, in each passing memory
Always there to guide you
When I mirror has been broken, shattered pieces scattered the ground
Glimpses of new life, reflect all around
Window of beginning, stillness, new light of the dawn
Let my silent empty body be filled and reborn
No need to search outside, not soil across the sea
'cause here shining inside me it's right here inside of me
I've found a brightness it's always with me"

Today was Career Day and I liked it a lot better than when I was just an ordinary student sitting in a classroom and listening to the speakers. I also helped them out by organizing a few things and setting up certain things and guiding people around for a tour. I was an ambassador for my school so it was pretty cool especially in the last two sessions when Sophia Maxwell came and I was assigned to her. It was pretty fun and I enjoyed it a lot. Wish every school day could be like today. I had to work but it was something that I like. Besides Sophie Maxwell, Kamala Harris and Heather Hiles also came to speak to us which was amazing because you think of them as politicians and not any more but today was when you got a different perspective about what they do and all the hard work that goes into it. I saw most of the speakers because I also had to go around and take pictures, it was really boring after a while since I was then asked to go around several more times taking more pictures of the same thing......that wasn't good. I should have a test in science tomorrow and maybe a spelling bee in language arts who knows. I should just study anyways just in case I do. I also need to take care of the T-shirt sales......people need to pay if any is reading this which for some reason I feel like I'm almost writing to myself. That's it I have tutoring tomorrow after school so yeah tomorrow will be a productive day hopefully. I can't wait till the weekend comes though. Bye Bye

It's Monday....and I have so much homework to do...hehe I'm working on science right now but even though it's a lot of homework I kind of enjoy it...yes it sounds weird but I enjoy doing homework sometimes because it's something that keeps me busy especially when I have nothing to do. School was okay today we got off one hour early and that's for the whole week because it's parent/teacher conference week. hmm....my teacher was saying to me that this one person was going to have her mom go to P/T conferences and she was saying that "why would she need to go? To have teachers brag about her and say that she's the perfect student" Well anyways yeah my mom isn't going to p/t conferences this time but she went the first time to see how things are. I guess that I'm doing good in school. Have to think more like I'm in Lowell already rather than I'm in the 9th week of eighth grade. I know that no one else in my class is doing this but I just want to get into the habit of thinking this way just so I won't have to be surprised when I get into high school although it might be even tougher than it is now. I can understand why my teachers are being so hard on us even though it is the last couple of weeks of school but it's like we've heard over and over again " you guys need to act like high schoolers you can't play anymore because they won't take it and you need to get over the fact that in high school they won't hold your hand." Today I spent 41 minutes listening to my counselor talk about graduation and all that stuff and it makes me wonder why do they have to keep repeating themselves because I understood the first time I heard it.oh well....my break is over back to work.....bye bye

Yay!! It's the weekend I am so happy, I can finally relax bit and read...I haven't gotten a chance to read anything new....under too much pressure for school. Today I went out to visit a couple of places where seniors are and unfortunately no one wants to be interviewed so I don't think I can do my project which is sad because it was a good idea. Anyways....I hope I can find ways to maybe alternate my project because I don't want to change it. I register for Lowell yesterday and it took a while but it was okay....at least I didn't miss much of any class. hmm.....I was told that my spring concert for the orchestra that I am in isn't going to be on Friday, March 14 which means that I could've been in the school play.....I am mad but oh wells it just means that it wasn't meant to be and plus God has other plans for me. I can't wait till April comes because then I get to hear from Asian Pacific Fund to see the winners of their contest and then spring break is coming. This coming Wednesday is when I have Career Day at school. I need to be at school by 7:00 and it's going to be fun! Okay that's all I have to say for this day..I'm going back to practicing my violin now bye bye.

I'm in school right now and doing nothing because I need to plan my project for my GATE class. I'm doing my project on Senior Asian Immigrants and I already have certain places I want to go to have interview certain people but I have to call those places. I can't do that right now but yeah....Umm......I have no homework today yay but I took my science test today and feel like I got a c at least. Home...Tomorrow is St. Patrick day...I never celebrated much on this holiday. I got into Lowell...Yay....I guess... I'm proud of myself and I'm happy yet I'm not sure whether or not I want to go but the thing that seems to puzzle me is that it was my last choice and there were people that wanted it more than I did. Oh well I don't think I could do anything about it now but to just face it with happiness and the fact that I got in. I will have to go to the school for this next school hopefully I'll like it. hmm.....I don' know what else to talk about nothing much to talk about. Oh well.....Bye

I haven't received any high school acceptance letters yet so I'm worrying but I shouldn't be. My sister, Diane, got into Presideo so I'm happy for her but lets just hope that I won't fail her but not getting into Washington. I've been thinking a lot about high school and stuff....I hope that it'll be better than it is now although if I do get into Washington I won't know many people and those people that I know won't be the ones that I want be with. Hmm...Today was okay....Didn't do much but I think I got some things done. I've been wanting to write a lot but I can never get to it because I have this idea in my mine that I want continue but once I start writing it fades away like something is blocking me from writing.....

hmm today went to BASS(Bay Area Sunday School) which was good for me, I needed to get out. I took several workshops and I liked it pretty much. Special thanks to Miranda and Eugene for driving me to and back home from BASS and then to Stan for Dinner. The sky was beautiful tonight and on the way home I had actually composed a poem hehe...Not a very good one but the beginning of one. The inspiration for this particular poem was when I was looking over the bay and the moon light was shining so brightly unto it. It was just beautiful and anyways yeah it's an okay poem but I need to work on it. Ahh no I'm bleeding....no need to worry minor thing.....hehe Anyways yeah I liked today wish everyday could be like this.

I cried so badly in school today and it's not because people were bullying me or something but then I got this horrible stomach pain and I could barely walk. So then some people asked me if I was okay and I told them yes but then they went on asking if I was pregnant.......Ahhhh I got that question so many times and then it got to the point where it hurt so much that I was on the floor and some people came by and I guess they assumed that I was pregnant or something and they were praying for me and yeah I cried the entire time and then I had to skipp class.......Today was not a good day.....There are really some people that really don't care about you but they act like they do...I found some of those people today.....Hmm....going to BASS tomorrow. I have a report to do on Seahorses and then a test on Monday. Now that I think about what happened I'm glad that no teacher actually got the news that people thought I was pregnant or something......I just can't believe how hard I had cried today....I remembered the last time that I had cried that hard was when.............hmm shouldn't speak of it.

Today was an awful day....I had started it out great but by the end of school everything seems to have crashed down. Why are the people in school that have to be dependent of others? Why? Ugh I just don't understand the reason that people would want to control others. I had a project due today for my Language Arts class and I practically did everything. Now I usually won't care because I would be the one getting all the credit if it was a group work and this was too but she was giving the entire team a grade not only one person. So then my partner was out the whole entire time we did the project or wasn't even helping me do anything when she was in school which made me angry because I don't get how she is making me fail when I did all the work and the work deserves a good grade. She messed up from the first thing that she said and ugh I'm just really mad....I can't really see how I am getting angry here but it's not something that happens often. My partner is like one of those people who say that they are your friend but then talks behind your back and the one who won't do anything but expects someone else to do their work for them. See....my point here is that I am getting tired of people doing that. I will help them but I certainly won't give them my work to copy I wish I could just say that the people who ask but being who I am I can't do that. So anyways it feels better now to type it all out...Hmm that's it oh and the thing that I was happy about was that I received an A on my science test then yesterday I was confronted by one of the staff telling me that I have the chance of being Valedictorian this year.